marriage, divorce, marriage, child, divorce
CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECK
Grad school, career
Child leaves home
You don’t think you ever are going to run out of excuses or time but all of a sudden you do. The only excuses left are your own fears, distractions, and disorganization. As I enter year three in retirement I recently did a bit of calculating. At 64 I have maybe 20 good years left if cancer, dementia, or a stroke doesn’t take me out first. So asked myself, “what is my finale?” Mine is a simple answer- I want to do art and write (with a bit of travel for spice).
That being said I’ve decided to “throw overboard” stuff that doesn’t serve my end game. I want to make sure I never again have to do production ceramics so I sold my big kiln last week. My beautiful Gibson guitar hasn’t been seriously played since my early 20s. At this point it just makes me feel guilty. I will put in the hands of someone who will make beautiful music with it. I realized that my time for any more fly in river trips in Alaska is over so my collapsible kayak goes for sale soon. Last weekend we had people dig up our blueberry patch for free since we really didn’t have time or energy maintain it. My business “Artisan Airplants” is slowly being dismantled.
I’ve begun a more committed practice for creative endeavors and I am seeing results in both tangible and emotional form. It’s a powerful shift. With any new journey, it’s both exhilarating and frightening at the same time. Still, with a lightened load, my steps are quickened. I am looking ahead and will not look back.